How Special Education Students Can Benefit From an Adapted ’Circle of Control’

Sometimes, everything’s going fine for a special education teacher, and then, boom, a small disturbance—maybe a surprise fire drill or a teasing comment between students—causes a massive vibe shift in the classroom. Moments like these aren’t just frustrating; they can be overwhelming for special education students. Pencils drop, heads go down, lessons are derailed.

The instinct of teachers is often to step in and offer reassurances: “Stay calm” and “Let’s move on.” But let’s be real—those words don’t always help. As a high school special education teacher myself, I’ve found that my students need more than just comfort; they need a re-centering tool. That’s where the circle of control concept comes in.

Though it’s not a magic solution, the circle of control has given my students something concrete to lean on in difficult times. They’ve started building resilience—not through big, dramatic changes, but through small wins, one step at a time.

Why I Reimagined the Circle of Control for My Students

The circle of control is adapted from a concept introduced by Stephen Covey in his 1989 book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Covey’s concept features three overlapping spheres: a circle of concern, which contains a circle of influence, which contains a circle of control. These spheres are meant to help people focus their energy on what they can control instead of stressing over what they can’t. It’s a great idea, but when I first heard of it, I thought, how can I make this work for my students, especially those who process the world differently?

I wanted to emphasize something more easily relatable for my students. Something they could see, touch, and use. I decided to home in on a revised version of the circle of control, which I broke down into two simple parts:

• What can you control? (actions, words, and choices)
• What can’t you control? (others’ actions, sudden changes, and the weather)

This framework helped my students pause and sort things out in real time. The pause is everything. It creates space for students to choose a different response—one that doesn’t involve shutting down or giving up.

How I Made It Work

I didn’t need to reinvent the wheel to make the circle of control manageable for students. Here are the three steps I employed.

Keep it simple: My language was super-clear. No big words, just two questions: What can you control? And what can’t you control? These two prompts were the key to my students’ shifting their thinking from Why is this happening to me? to What can I do about it?

Use visual cues and hands-on activities: Many of my students are visual learners, so we worked together to create a simple model—a circle on paper. Inside the circle, students wrote or drew things they could control. Outside the circle went things they couldn’t control. This wasn’t just about filling out a worksheet; it was providing students with something they could see and touch when they were overwhelmed.

At first, students heavily relied on the visual tool. But over time, they came to use it less and less. They started mentally sorting through what was in their control and what wasn’t. Dual processing kicked in. By combining the visual cue with the act of thinking things through, students came to own this strategy. They didn’t simply memorize it. Dual-processing research from cognitive scientist Richard Mayer shows that people learn better when they engage both visual and verbal pathways. This also applies to many of my special education students, who benefit from seeing and doing.

Consistently reinforce: The circle of control doesn’t stick without consistency. Every time a student felt overwhelmed, I asked the same question: “Is that something you can control?” I wasn’t trying to point out what they may have done wrong—I just wanted them to pause and reflect. At first, students needed me as a guide, but over time, they started asking this question rhetorically, on their own.

Real-Life Wins That Matter

To be clear, students haven’t stopped feeling frustrated when disturbances and conflicts arise. But they’ve handled difficult situations much more deftly. They’re making progress, and progress is a win. Here’s what that’s looked like in my classroom.

Managing sensory overload: A student who previously shut down during fire drills now covers his ears and waits by the door. He’s still uncomfortable, but he’s learned how to manage his anxiety.

Handling peer language: Students who reacted emotionally when they heard unkind words now either walk away or ask for a break.

Adapting to changes: When an outdoor activity was canceled because of rain, one student shrugged and said, “We can’t change the weather.” They internalized the strategy to regulate their emotions.

Incorporate the Circle of Control in Your Classroom

If you want to try this concept in your classroom, here’s a simple framework.

1. Introduce the concept. Keep the language simple. What can you control? What can’t you control?
2. Use visual cues. Create a reusable tool, like a laminated circle or chart on a whiteboard, that students can use whenever they feel stuck.
3. Encourage reflection. Have students reflect on situations where they use the circle of control. This reinforces the habit.
4. Be consistent. Regular prompts like “Is that something you can control?” help students internalize the process. Over time, they’ll independently ask the question.